More tales of Masq, unhip lesbian TV whore extraordinaire

16 Aug

Snippets of conversation from last night’s on-going L-Word marathon with my friend Ann:


Ann: Oh, c’mon. These women are supposed to be in their late twenties. They shouldn’t have even heard of ‘Closer to Fine’.
Masq: The Indigo Girls aren’t in anymore?
Ann: *askance look*

Masq: The ‘best-friend stage that immediately follows a break up’? OK, I take it back. They actually do have lesbian writers on this show…. But if one of the characters says ‘U-Haul’, I’m going to yak.
Ann: I think someone might, because Dana’s totally U-Hauling.
Masq: Yeah, and I guess they did have that ‘you can tell if a woman’s a lesbian by the length of her fingernails thing’ a few episodes back.

Masq: I don’t get this ‘Drag King’ thing. I mean, can you say, ‘total rip-off of gay male culture’?
Masq, a few minutes later: I guess some women would find dressing up like a man and lip-syncing a liberating experience. I just wish they’d called it something other than ‘Drag Kings’.
Masq, a few minutes after that: I could totally see myself in a zoot suit and slicked back hair crooning Brian Ferry tunes.

Masq: OMG. They totally marginalize butch-femme on this show.
Ann: Well, it’s L.A. It’s so anti-PC, it’s PC.

Masq: Watching this show makes me feel completely inadequate about my love-life.
Ann: Well, sure. It’s TV. What normally happens to us over the span of five years happens to them over the span of five months.

Masq: So what do you think of the carpenter? She seems like your type.
Ann: She’s actually not working for me.
(cut to after the Bette/carpenter hotel scene)
Ann: OK, she’s working for me now.

Masq: Is it *wrong* of me to find Shane completely hot?
Ann: After the last episode, I’m thinking yes.
Masq: My therapist tells me that if I’m completely in lust with a woman at first sight, I should turn around and run the other way. Fast. I’m beginning to see her point.

Masq: Wow, I always thought that the Dinah Shore Invitational was a pretentious sports tournament for people who actually enjoy watching golf. Turns out it’s a giant lesbian orgy. Who knew?
Ann: I’m going.
Masq: Me, too.

Bette/Tina is love

♥ Bette/Tina is love

Bette/Tina is love

♥ Bette/Tina is love

17 Responses to “More tales of Masq, unhip lesbian TV whore extraordinaire”

  1. ann1962 August 16, 2004 at 10:03 am #

    Confused. LOL

    I have only played golf once.

  2. neshaffer August 16, 2004 at 10:09 am #

    When I first started watching this show, I thought it was written by a bunch of straight guys (or straight women) because it seemed utterly ignorant of lesbian culture.

    Turns out it’s so full of lesbian in-jokes and sub-cultural references, a straight person would probably not “get” any of the above conversational snippets.

  3. ann1962 August 16, 2004 at 10:12 am #

    I got a few of them 😉

  4. neshaffer August 16, 2004 at 10:13 am #

    I do find it interesting that you’ve only played golf once. Nebraska is the golf-course capital of the world!

  5. ann1962 August 16, 2004 at 10:15 am #

    Once when I was about 18, and apparently I was making too many comments about little balls for my boyfriend and his friends to be amused. Never played after that. Not one for games I am!

  6. neshaffer August 16, 2004 at 10:19 am #

    Not one for games I am!

    I hear yah.

  7. ladystarlightsj August 16, 2004 at 4:39 pm #

    Golf is the fastest way I know to ruin a good walk.

  8. sidherian August 16, 2004 at 5:06 pm #

    Masq: Wow, I always thought that the Dinah Shore Invitational was a pretentious sports tournament for people who actually enjoy watching golf. Turns out it’s a giant lesbian orgy. Who knew?
    Ann: I’m going.
    Masq: Me, too.

    Me three!

  9. neshaffer August 16, 2004 at 6:28 pm #

    Palm Springs, here we come!

  10. neshaffer August 16, 2004 at 6:48 pm #

    It’s also apparently a great way to meet chicks. I might have to take a break during my next walk and putt a few onto the green.

  11. sidherian August 16, 2004 at 7:03 pm #

    Give me a decade to save up first though : (

  12. neshaffer August 16, 2004 at 7:10 pm #

    Maybe they have the Australian equivalent of the Dinah Shore Tournament in the Australian equivalent of Palm Springs?

  13. sidherian August 16, 2004 at 10:06 pm #

    AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

    The only thing even remotely like that is the G & L Mardi Gras Dance Party in Sydney. And I’m too old for that, and it’s full of bloody british backpackers on E anyway.

  14. crimsonsenya August 16, 2004 at 11:41 pm #

    I’m sorry I can’t comment anything witty, instead I really have to ask about the U-Haul and I guess PC is something else than a personal computer :D. Then I staterd to think of women who could work for me and I came up with Talia Shire (the actress that plays the sister in The Gosfather trilogy. If I could choose my looks, I’d choose to look like she did in the third installment. She’s absolutely stunning.

  15. neshaffer August 17, 2004 at 7:20 am #

    A U-Haul is a rental truck that people use to move from one home to another. There’s an expression “U-Haul on the second date” which is kind of a joke, but also serious, about how lesbians sometimes fall into a committed relationship with each other too fast. Like the day after they first have sex, or first have a date. On the show, a character, Dana, sleeps with a woman she just met at the Dinah Shore Tournament and the next day they’re holding hands and making googly eyes and a few weeks later they say they’re getting married.

    Women. Sheesh.

    PC stands for “Politically Correct”. I’ll explain that more if you want me to.

  16. crimsonsenya August 17, 2004 at 7:52 am #

    PC! I should have guessed, lol. That word I know.
    I added the interests and added the l to dara. *g*

  17. ladystarlightsj August 20, 2004 at 7:07 pm #

    Well, good luck and all.

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