Harry Plato and the Half-Blood Philosopher

26 Jul

This about sums up my life, and well, life in San Francisco.

I’m walking home past the Laurel Heights strip mall with a copy of Harry Potter and the HPB sans dust jacket tucked under my arm. It’s thick and has the hard black cover with the title in gold on the spine. Ahead of me, I can see a guy standing by a little make-shift podium with a big poster on it demanding the resignation of Dick Cheney (“and the jerk or the dweeb or the shrub (I forget the words) can go second”). He has a clip board and a smile so you know he’s looking for signatures.

Although I have some agreement with the sentiment, I doubt this is the way to go about it and so I walk briskly past, not looking at clip-board guy. But he’s trying to get my attention of course, so he says to me, “Hey! Is that Plato? Are you reading Plato?!”

Now mind you, I don’t know this guy from Adam and vice-versa. I scurry on my way.

Well, you know, it could have been Plato I had tucked in my arm.

Nah, that book sits on my shelf for show now, next to the equally impressive-looking Aristotle and Heidegger hard-bound volumes. I read Harry Potter on the bus.

31 Responses to “Harry Plato and the Half-Blood Philosopher”

  1. chickenfeet2003 July 26, 2005 at 4:59 pm #

    What we need is Plato fic. Maybe Phryne indulging her taste for rough trade with a quick three obol shag with Socrates behind the agora?

  2. neshaffer July 26, 2005 at 5:14 pm #

    Well, philosopher!pr0n does give new meaning to the word “deep”.

    ; )

  3. fresne July 26, 2005 at 6:00 pm #

    Perhaps a short cautionary tale in which Phaedrus writes Thoth / Amon-Re porn and presents it to Socrates as a gift.

    However, Socrates tells Phaedrus that in writing the action, Phaedrus has lost the physical immediacy of the response. Then Socrates would proceed to demonstrate what he means.

  4. arethusa2 July 26, 2005 at 6:40 pm #

    Unless he has a special prosecutor folded up and tucked into the podium, I don’t think he’s going to help very much.

  5. cornerofmadness July 26, 2005 at 6:52 pm #

    I’m not sure which is more amusing the incident or the responses

  6. neshaffer July 26, 2005 at 6:59 pm #

    I’ll be there is Ancient Philosopher fanfic out there. I imagine if you look long enough, you’ll find just about anything in internet land.

  7. cornerofmadness July 26, 2005 at 7:03 pm #

    I’ve seen Bible fanfic, I kid you not

  8. buffyannotater July 26, 2005 at 7:15 pm #

    I’ve heard there’s David/Jonathan fic out there.

  9. neshaffer July 26, 2005 at 7:36 pm #

    Seen some of that myself.

  10. cornerofmadness July 26, 2005 at 7:38 pm #

    I haven’t read it, mind you. I’m too afraid

  11. neshaffer July 26, 2005 at 7:48 pm #

    Yeah, who knows what their motives/kinks are.

  12. cornerofmadness July 26, 2005 at 7:51 pm #

    exactly

  13. ljash July 26, 2005 at 9:15 pm #

    I didn’t know they made Plato editions in that particular shade of neon green. Or even considered it.

  14. neshaffer July 26, 2005 at 9:25 pm #

    What shade of neon green would that be?

  15. ladyhelix July 27, 2005 at 1:57 am #

    **SNERK**

    The first time I read this – I thought he meant YOU were Plato!! Hey who KNOWS what kind of drugs those wacky kids are on these days.

  16. neshaffer July 27, 2005 at 2:23 am #

    No, I’m Pluto.

    ; )

  17. ironed_orchid July 27, 2005 at 10:40 am #

    Don’t tell me you haven’t read ‘s philosopher pr0n?

  18. neshaffer July 27, 2005 at 1:52 pm #

    Ha! Have you ever posted that link at ?

  19. ironed_orchid July 27, 2005 at 2:00 pm #

    mentioned it in her application.

  20. neshaffer July 27, 2005 at 2:07 pm #

    How come I never noticed *that* application!?

  21. ironed_orchid July 27, 2005 at 2:11 pm #

    Maybe she joined before you did. It’s one of my favourites.

  22. neshaffer July 27, 2005 at 2:12 pm #

    Did she start the whole “philosophy books are my bra” trend?

  23. ironed_orchid July 27, 2005 at 2:17 pm #

    That might have been our illustrious leader, miss DivaFu.

  24. neshaffer July 27, 2005 at 2:25 pm #

    Well, I have seen plenty of Diva’s photo shoots.

    ; )

  25. starryniteshade July 27, 2005 at 2:38 pm #

    No, I’m Pluto.

    knew it! I knew it! I knew it! I just knew it!

    uh….the cartoon dog, the planet or the god(dess) of the underworld?

  26. neshaffer July 27, 2005 at 4:09 pm #

    Can I be all three?

    Besides, the goddess of the underworld was Persephone (Proserpina)

  27. starryniteshade July 27, 2005 at 4:55 pm #

    You’re right about that, but I thought that if you replaced Pluto as god(dess) of the underworld then Persephone could be your consort.

    You can be all three, but do you really want to look like…well, any of them?

  28. neshaffer July 27, 2005 at 5:54 pm #

    Hmm….shall I be a planet, a dog, or a god with a beautiful consort?

    Gee, that’s a tough one.

    ; )

  29. starryniteshade July 27, 2005 at 7:44 pm #

    Hmm….shall I be a planet, a dog, or a god with a beautiful consort?

    Far be it from me to interupt someone’s day dream…..well, actually do that sometimes….just not this time. 🙂

  30. ljash July 29, 2005 at 2:49 am #

    That color that HPB is. At least, I think that’s what we were talking about (I don’t log on enough nor remember what I was saying 🙂

  31. neshaffer July 29, 2005 at 2:55 am #

    My copy of HPB is black, both the cover of the book and the dust jacket.

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